A Very Appropriate Memorial Day
We celebrated my Mom & Dad's 65th anniversary on Memorial Day this year. The actual anniversary is June 13th, but we had to find a day when the whole family could make it (with the exception of my niece in New Zealand.) It was a very good day, as most of the surviving aunts and uncles joined us, along with over half of our cousins. Some of them I haven't seen since Aunt Emma's funeral a few years ago.
It's hard to imagine 65 years with someone. Mom & Dad not only lived together, but worked together. If I added up all the nights they spent apart in their marriage (hospital stays, the occasional church convention) I believe it would be less than a month of those 65 years. That just boggles my mind.
Watching Mom & Dad, I can see how they managed to make it this far though. True to their good German heritage and farmer tough-skin, they are not overly expressive. PDA's are not in abundance. But if you watch closely, you can see the occasional touches and exchanged glances that speak volumes. There is an unexpressed tenderness between them, but you have to keep your eyes open to see it.
I've been remembering a few other anniversary celebrations over the years. I'm not sure which one (25th maybe?) but at one large party held at the town hall, my Dad's cousins set up a "mock wedding" where they dressed up my 6'3" father as the bride. That's all I remember of it, so I think it must have traumatized me to see my Dad in that wig and dress. I also remember the 50th anniversary as we had a wedding renewal ceremony at church. I was just out of seminary then, and spoke at the service as well as singing "If These Walls Could Talk" with my sister Kaye. We've sung for them before too - during a regular church service for their 40th, I believe. That time the song was "Borning Cry."
Yes many years of memories were played out in all of our minds on Memorial Day. And yet many more were created. The newest generation of Totzke descendants has been growing. One of my favorite moments of the day was watching my dad, my nephew Jeremy, and Jeremy's 6-month-old son Grayson.
Dad's face says it all. I especially love the fact that toothless great-grandpa matches toothless great-grandson. Dad now has 3 great-grandsons and 1 great-granddaughter - 2 actually if you count Eric's step-daughter. I wonder if Dad ever expected to see the day when he would find his genes carried on so far. And I wonder if little Grayson realizes who that toothless old man is as he grips his chin. These moments are far too rare, and priceless. I know Grayson won't remember it, but hopefully Jeremy will, and will tell him about his great-grandpa someday (the good stuff!)
But the best part of this picture? Dad lost his combover!!! He has been in the running for the world's longest combover for years, and finally let Mom cut it off recently. He looks so much more handsome now without that hair falling down to his shoulders whenever the wind blows.
Yes, it was a very good day. Makes me wonder how many more days like this we may be blessed enough to have.
It's hard to imagine 65 years with someone. Mom & Dad not only lived together, but worked together. If I added up all the nights they spent apart in their marriage (hospital stays, the occasional church convention) I believe it would be less than a month of those 65 years. That just boggles my mind.
Watching Mom & Dad, I can see how they managed to make it this far though. True to their good German heritage and farmer tough-skin, they are not overly expressive. PDA's are not in abundance. But if you watch closely, you can see the occasional touches and exchanged glances that speak volumes. There is an unexpressed tenderness between them, but you have to keep your eyes open to see it.
I've been remembering a few other anniversary celebrations over the years. I'm not sure which one (25th maybe?) but at one large party held at the town hall, my Dad's cousins set up a "mock wedding" where they dressed up my 6'3" father as the bride. That's all I remember of it, so I think it must have traumatized me to see my Dad in that wig and dress. I also remember the 50th anniversary as we had a wedding renewal ceremony at church. I was just out of seminary then, and spoke at the service as well as singing "If These Walls Could Talk" with my sister Kaye. We've sung for them before too - during a regular church service for their 40th, I believe. That time the song was "Borning Cry."
Yes many years of memories were played out in all of our minds on Memorial Day. And yet many more were created. The newest generation of Totzke descendants has been growing. One of my favorite moments of the day was watching my dad, my nephew Jeremy, and Jeremy's 6-month-old son Grayson.
Dad's face says it all. I especially love the fact that toothless great-grandpa matches toothless great-grandson. Dad now has 3 great-grandsons and 1 great-granddaughter - 2 actually if you count Eric's step-daughter. I wonder if Dad ever expected to see the day when he would find his genes carried on so far. And I wonder if little Grayson realizes who that toothless old man is as he grips his chin. These moments are far too rare, and priceless. I know Grayson won't remember it, but hopefully Jeremy will, and will tell him about his great-grandpa someday (the good stuff!)
But the best part of this picture? Dad lost his combover!!! He has been in the running for the world's longest combover for years, and finally let Mom cut it off recently. He looks so much more handsome now without that hair falling down to his shoulders whenever the wind blows.
Yes, it was a very good day. Makes me wonder how many more days like this we may be blessed enough to have.
posted by Kris at 6/04/2007 12:03:00 PM
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