Anybody have some cheese?
OK, it's whine time. As if it's not bad enough to have to tolerate this late winter crap we're getting - more snow & rain mix on top of last weekend's snow - but I had to drive for 45 minutes through the crap to go to a follow-up mammogram today. Just the fact that I have to do follow-ups on a spot they KNOW is scar tissue sucks. They KNOW this is just a scar, but they still want to put me through the torture to see if the scar changes. geeeeeeezzzzz
My secretary and I have decided that if they had to do penis exams the same way they do mammograms, you darn well know there would be a much better method invented in about 2 days! If any of you guys want to know what it feels like, go home and squeeze your penis in the refrigerator door. Then have someone pull on it while the door is being closed slowly. That will give you some good indication.
Today's mammogram was about the worst one I've had too. I couldn't figure out what way she wanted me to face, or how far forward I was going to have to lean with my face already smushed into the protective plastic shield. I couldn't hold my breath nearly long enough for that darn thing to finish, and then ended up having to do one view over again too. Then you play the waiting game until the doc gets a chance to look at it and decide if he wants another view, or an ultrasound (which he did on both.) And then you're stuck in that little room with nothing but Woman's Day magazines in that goofy cloth gown that is way too small, wishing you were anywhere else but there. And every single magazine of the 8 on the pile has it's big headline article about some kind of weight loss or exercise thing that will miraculously help you lose all your weight in 6 weeks. Can they not get some kind of magazines besides Woman's Day or Better Homes & Gardens? Just because I have estrogen doesn't mean I automatically like those kinds of magazines. Give me a Newsday or Time or something - People or Us or anything besides the weight loss and domestic diva crap. Puh-leeze. Just shoot me now!
At least while I was getting the ultrasound, I was lying on a nice soft cushioned gurney - propped up against a wedge to hold me in position. I wouldn't want to lie all night like that, but it made for a nice napping spot while waiting for the doctor to give the ok this time. Just enough for a 15 minute power nap.
Finally, almost 2 hours later, I got to leave to drive back through the now semi-melted snow-covered streets to work. All this to find out there was "no change, but they want another follow-up in 6 months." Maybe. It's just a SCAR, fer pete's sake.
So now that I've had my fill of whine, anybody got some cheese for me?
My secretary and I have decided that if they had to do penis exams the same way they do mammograms, you darn well know there would be a much better method invented in about 2 days! If any of you guys want to know what it feels like, go home and squeeze your penis in the refrigerator door. Then have someone pull on it while the door is being closed slowly. That will give you some good indication.
Today's mammogram was about the worst one I've had too. I couldn't figure out what way she wanted me to face, or how far forward I was going to have to lean with my face already smushed into the protective plastic shield. I couldn't hold my breath nearly long enough for that darn thing to finish, and then ended up having to do one view over again too. Then you play the waiting game until the doc gets a chance to look at it and decide if he wants another view, or an ultrasound (which he did on both.) And then you're stuck in that little room with nothing but Woman's Day magazines in that goofy cloth gown that is way too small, wishing you were anywhere else but there. And every single magazine of the 8 on the pile has it's big headline article about some kind of weight loss or exercise thing that will miraculously help you lose all your weight in 6 weeks. Can they not get some kind of magazines besides Woman's Day or Better Homes & Gardens? Just because I have estrogen doesn't mean I automatically like those kinds of magazines. Give me a Newsday or Time or something - People or Us or anything besides the weight loss and domestic diva crap. Puh-leeze. Just shoot me now!
At least while I was getting the ultrasound, I was lying on a nice soft cushioned gurney - propped up against a wedge to hold me in position. I wouldn't want to lie all night like that, but it made for a nice napping spot while waiting for the doctor to give the ok this time. Just enough for a 15 minute power nap.
Finally, almost 2 hours later, I got to leave to drive back through the now semi-melted snow-covered streets to work. All this to find out there was "no change, but they want another follow-up in 6 months." Maybe. It's just a SCAR, fer pete's sake.
So now that I've had my fill of whine, anybody got some cheese for me?
posted by Kris at 3/01/2007 01:43:00 PM
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